You know you’re getting old when . . .

  • You can identify a 1969 Mach I and Dodge R/T by the sound.
  • You remember people who liked Sanka and thought it taste good.
  • Girls who wore skirts above the knees were sluts.
  • Somebody used to clean your windshield and check the oil when you got gas.
  • You could put air in your tires for free.
  • Breakfast was either shredded wheat or corn flakes.
  • Everybody supported the President.
  • Socialism was a bad thing.
  • Congress was respected.
  • You had to go to two stores to get gas and bread.
  • The worst thing to have was cooties.
  • Stores were closed on Sundays.
  • Nobody watched the NFL and players got $50 per game (only if they played).
  • You remember your mother shoveling coal into the furnace before bed.
  • Your parents didn’t have to pay anything for you to play football.
  • The electric bill was over three dollars and your dad freaked out.
  • You would giggle when anyone said the word “sex”.
  • Your mom was afraid of the washing machine rollers.
  • You wore a coat and tie on an airliner.
  • Stores had an honor system that would allow you to put things on credit.
  • You always shined your shoes after wearing them.
  • Stuff made in Japan was junk.
  • Kissing a girl was a big deal.
  • Actors acted and weren’t political experts.
  • Mainline churches followed the Bible.
  • You remember guys you went to school with who died in Vietnam.

More recent things . . .

  • A double date meant two couples, not seeing two girls the same night.
  • Friends with benefits meant they had health insurance.
  • Girls only slid down poles in dark, back alley bars, not at the Super Bowl.